U! S! A! U! S! A!

g-d is PISSED.

look at Him shooting lasers at st. peter's. thx a lot, ratzi-nazi!

bad news

bank of america helped me figure out how much I'll need to save for retirement. 

1 lotto ticket please...

calculate yours, if you want to die of sadness.

son of a!

The unemployment rate for recent graduates was highest in architecture, at 13.9 percent, probably at least partly because of the housing market collapse. Even architecture majors who went on to receive graduate degrees, which usually safeguard workers from unemployment, are doing poorly in the job market. With a jobless rate of 7.7 percent, architecture majors who hold graduate degrees are still more likely to be unemployed than newly minted college grads who studied journalism (!). (via)

god DAMN it!

QB # 3.....nbd.

True freshman quarterback Justin Worley will start Saturday when Tennessee takes on No. 14 South Carolina at Neyland Stadium on Saturday.

Worley, a Rock Hill, S.C., native who broke numerous state passing records, replaces senior Matt Simms, who struggled over the past two weeks against No. 1 LSU and No. 2 Alabama.

"We're not throwing and catching the way we need to and we're not calling the game the way we want to," coach Derek Dooley said today at his weekly press conference. "We just need to make this move.

"It's not something that's done on a whim. We have a lot of data to make a switch. We don't have a lot of data on Justin."

Worley hadn't seen the field until the fourth quarter of Saturday's 37-6 loss at Alabama. Worley didn't attempt the pass, as UT (3-4, 0-4 SEC) fumbled on the first play of his first possession and was pinned to its own goal line on its final possession. (via)

i'm sure everything will be fine. just fine.

HTFD.

hunker the fuck down.
NYC Hurricane Map

oh brother.

(via)

y'all see this?

 panic!

is everyone caught up?

congressional leaders managed to strike a deal on a bill, which passed in the house yesterday, and will be voted on by the senate today. nobody is happy, which is the hallmark of a good compromise. and by "a good compromise", i mean "things are worse than ever."

did you guys hear who showed up to cast a vote last minute?

Scores of Democrats initially held back from voting, to force Republicans to register their positions first. Then, as the time for voting wound down, Representative Gabrielle Giffords, Democrat of Arizona, returned to the floor for the first time since being shot in January and voted for the bill to jubilant applause and embraces from her colleagues. It provided an unexpected, unifying ending to a fierce standoff in the House. (via)

jon stewart's two cents:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Dealageddon! - A Compromise Without Revenues
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog The Daily Show on Facebook

come on, republicans.

maybe you've been hearing about this debt ceiling crisis that's been gummin' up the works in DC. i don't really feel like explaining it (read a newspaper), but basically we've got to pass a bill to prevent the US from defaulting on its debt, an occurrence that most economists agree would have catastrophic effects on the american and world economies.

as happens with pretty much every issue in washington these days, this bill is being held up by a reluctance of both parties to compromise. on friday, before heading off to camp david for the weekend, obama sat down with boehner and they hammered out a deal where both sides gave a little. the republicans would relent on their refusal to allow any tax increases whatsoever, and the democrats would let them put their filthy pawz all over our social security and medicare.

now, both constituencies were p'd-o when they heard what their leaders had offered up, but only one party leader reneged on the deal within 24 hours when his party threw a temper tantrum. i'll let you guess which.

obama's giving a p-conf aaannnny minute:

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

fired UP.

wanna hear something disGUSTing? did you know that in new york city, if you want to play tennis at public park courts, you have to purchase a permit for $100 annually? i know. and listen to this: currently, the parks department is moving forward with a plan to increase the annual permit cost to $200. two. hundred. that's double.

leading the opposition is the mccarren tennis association, who famously raised money independently last year to resurface one of the seven courts at mccarren park, because the city has not done so in over 30 years. the USTA took notice, and granted them $56,000 more to finish the resurfacing the other courts. (before / after) now they are focusing their efforts on the parks commissioner, in an attempt to kill this measure, which will be voted on in a couple of weeks.

you can read an op-ed in the brooklyn paper here, written by one of the group's founding members. and if you feel like expressing yourself, shoot the parks department a quick message here.

bad news bearz

ooooooooohhhnonononnonnononoooooo!!!!

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — Tennessee starting wide receiver Gerald Jones has a broken bone in his left hand and could miss at least two or three games.

That would keep out the Volunteers' leading receiver from the past two seasons for games against No. 11 Oregon, No. 4 Florida and UAB.

Jones, who is a senior, led Tennessee (1-0) in a 50-0 win over Tennessee-Martin on Saturday with 86 yards on six catches. He left the field clutching his left hand midway through the third quarter after catching a 37-yard pass from Matt Simms, his longest reception of the game.

Dooley also says wide receiver Denarius Moore is questionable for Oregon on Saturday after suffering a "banged-up ankle," and offensive guard Jerrod Shaw is questionable with a right ankle injury. (via)

goddamnit.

oil spill FAIL

according to the internet, BP's about to admit that they're never going to be able to stop the oil spill, and we should all just start getting used to it.

;(

that doesn't look right.

omg ctm gmab!

of course that giant oil condom didn't work! and you know what that means... time to head on down to your neighborhood duane reade and pick up some plan b!

In a radio interview with local radio station WWL, Admiral Thad Allen—recently appointed by President Obama as the National Incident Commander overseeing the recovery efforts in the Gulf—said the backup plan is to "clog it up like you would clog up a toilet" using things like "chopped up tires, pieces of rubber, golf balls" and other clogging agents. (via)

golf balls! we are sooooo sca-rewed.

bonus link: photos from the gulf. thx dale!

omg, did you hear?!

twilight star rachelle lefevre, who plays victoria in the first 2 movies, has been replaced! she agreed to be in another movie that shoots for 10 days during eclipse's 3 month shooting schedule, and summit has decided not to accomodate her.


they would rather re-cast her as stoopid bryce howard and ruin everyone's lives.

too b, rachelle. this was your big break. i hope you have fun with dustin hoffman and that this isn't the end of your career. (and,actually, i think bryce will make a pretty awesome vampire. i just don't like change.)

colbert gets screwed

What do you do when you're NASA and comedian Stephen Colbert wins your contest to name the new wing for the International Space Station? You name an orbital exercise machine after him.

The Combined Operational Load Bearing External Resistance Treadmill, or COLBERT, is expected to keep astronauts in shape.

With the help of a legion of fans, Colbert got the most votes in the space agency's online poll soliciting names for Node 3, which will be called Tranquility after the Sea of Tranquility, where Apollo 11 landed on the moon.

Astronaut Sunita "Suni" Williams revealed NASA's decision on "The Colbert Report," which aired on Comedy Central on Tuesday.

"Your name will be in space, in a very important place," Williams said as Colbert reacted in mock disgust to her announcement of the node's new name.

"I think a treadmill is better than a node ... because the node is just a box for the treadmill," Colbert deadpanned. "Nobody says, 'Hey, my mom bought me a Nike box.' They want the shoes that are inside." (cnn)

OMG THATS THE GROSSEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN

Star-nose-mole. By.far.the.grossest.thing.i've.ever.seen.

jic...

the light in gabe's hallway has been out for weeks. the light switch is in the on position, and has been since we discovered that the light bulb needed changing. so, you can imagine my surprise just now, when the light sprung to life...flickering on and continuing to flicker for roughly 8-9 seconds, until it dimmed out. a few seconds later, it flashed back to life one last time and has been silent since.

i'm telling you this just in case something happens to me. as far as i can tell, it's either some dangerous faulty wiring, or a poltergeist. and after a few slammed-door incidents while i've been home alone, i'm leaning toward the latter...

(all of the suspicious activity has come from gabe's wing. just sayin')

gobbling my goop : pan flutes

you know what gobbles my goop? pan flutes. god help the pan flute player, 'cause you are scaruuuuwed in life.



;(