gchatz w/ john

me: brb making lunch
john: every time an anus closes, god opens a mouth.
me: thats outrageous
john: i said it to starla, and she didn't understand.
me: oc not
john: i asked her if she ever heard the expression "when a door closes, god open a window."
she said no
and i gave up
me: that phrase, the original
paints an image of being in an upper floor apartment in a fire
in a horror movie
where doors slam shut right when you get to them
and maybe the fire is a hellfire
set by satan himself
and then jesus shows up
and just opens a window
just as you're about to gasp in your last breath
and succumb to the sweet sleep of death
john: that's totally what they mean when they say that
me: i hope so
john: but the narrative was too long