Because no one is rich anymore. n'est-ce pas?

Cadillac 1% ad vs. Ford Parody ad:

#1 - America is a bunch of old white male baby boomers who wish they were astronauts 

#2 - America is a bunch of people like  Pasho Murray, a real woman who founded Detroit Dirt, a company that turns waste into compost and sells it to people who want to create urban gardens.

via : http://www.towleroad.com/2014/03/ford-skewers-cadillacs-1-percent-ad-with-locally-grown-parody-video.html

MU$☝☾ M☝NUT€ W/ M$D∆NG€L$ - HERITAGE EDITION

"Anything Goes" by Cole Porter

so this is what happened to avonte oquendo

this article might make you cry tears out of your cynical dry eyes

Omg Vic Mackey is going to be in AHS: Freak Show

hooray!

dont forget to watch :53- 1:05

this baby elephant playing with his ball will brighten your day. and don't worry, this is just his inside play room, he has a whole yard outside too. via

fridayz with flim

just barely getting by here people...1.5 hrs to go. xoxoxoxo flimmmmmmmmmmm

i promise to protect you if you promise to protect me

the babadook looks scary


the director, re: her reviews
"Actually, I don't normally read them, but my producer said, "Please read these." It was a really great review. It talked about how the film felt like an echo of these kind of seventies horror heroines, for want of a better word. But not with the sardonic male P.O.V. And I think that's a really big complement. I really wanted the audience to have two gentle hands placed around their neck until they felt like, "I can't breathe. Make this stop." And then it explodes. So I did. I wanted it to be uncomfortable. I wanted them to feel what it feels like to deny your own experience."

interstellar - rust cohle goes to space

lets go vols!

The calm before the storm... pic.twitter.com/pVnoKwhdvy

— Tennessee Basketball (@Vol_Hoops) March 28, 2014

te quiero, Shaki.

If you don't know, I'm a big ol Shakira fan. She's beautiful, talented, and has a hot husband. And those hips DO NOT LIE:





Happy almost Friday!

speaking of gays

this is cute!
Post by Malditos Marginalesss.

this happened!

(via)

sisyphus - booty call

starring snuffles.

you guys im leaving in like an hour to go to austin for erin macbreath's bachelorette event!

i'll be live-tweeting (unless i don't) so check your @2PzNaPpod tweets!!

Thomas Wilhelm's home and private collection is profiled on Buzzfeed

"This Guy’s SoHo Loft May House The Biggest Collection Of Homoerotic Art In New York"

http://www.buzzfeed.com/hughryan/this-guys-soho-loft-may-house-the-biggest-collection-of-homo

so NSFW

COME VISIT ME IN MEMPHIS

enter this contest, and you could win....

Luxury Hotel Stays – You’ll be comfortably lodged in one of the city’s choicest downtown hotels.

Memphis-Made Gifts – You can come home with one of three prizes like a St. Blues™ guitar or cooking lessons with award-winning chef, Felicia Suzanne. 

Passes to Premier Attractions – See Graceland^®, Sun Studio, the National Civil Rights Museum^®, the Memphis Zoo, the Memphis Rock ’n’ Soul Museum and more. 

Dining at Fine Restaurants — Taste the very best of Southern fare, including Memphis-style barbecue, deep-fried soul food, and delectable fine dining at four-star restaurants.

PLUS you get to hang out with me!

weird sci-fi from the wachowski siblings with mila kunis and channing tatum

im IN

they're getting ready for tomorrow

Practice @Pacers facility - pic.twitter.com/k7pjRlUjal

— Vol Photos (@Vol_Photos) March 27, 2014

what?!

Giant pyramid of captured German WWI helmets at Grand Central Terminal, NYC, 1918. pic.twitter.com/K2ZnJNxyTZ

— Jerry Saltz (@jerrysaltz) March 27, 2014

dolly Dolly DOLLY

I've been contemplating this post since 3pm on Sunday afternoon and  I will remember that day for the rest of my life. Some of you may have heard the interwebs gossiping about it (scooped by the paparazzi) but here is it...I saw Dolly Parton, faint, #sigh. I was just munchin on some delicious eats at Urban Grub in Nashville, quietly re-hydrating from a wild night post CFP exam, and the next thing I know a little tiny angel walked in the door. I literally was stuck in my chair. I had no idea what to do except squeal...so i did. No one seemed to notice because we all gasped in unison. See the rest of the story via grainy pictures below:

spotted a million miles away...

this is when she sees me-JOY!

i told her she was an angel and then went in for a hug

(#inmydaydreams)

everybody getting geared up for friday?

"let's tighten them screws up. we can dance a little bit better." -cuonzo

the best part of waking up...

is the growling of your belly for pretend bacon? #ohyahright

"A new alarm app by Oscar Mayer deceives you out of bed every morning to not only the sweet sound of frying bacon, but to the smell as well. A small gadget attached to your iPhone's headphone jack sends a bacon fragrance your way as the alarm sizzles. But, there is no bacon."

This app is like the one I'm sure everyone has already heard about except that you can only get it by WINNING it. Click here to enter. Brought to you by H00sierdaddy via engadget.

a dog

dog.gawker.com

The best reaction to the Kimye cover ... and the best reaction to anything ever.

Naomi: "...I do not want to comment"

Anchor: "Why?"

Naomi: "UMAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH"

MU$☝☾ M☝NUT€ W/ M$D∆NG€L$

Busy Earnin' by Jungle

video by Arthur Mulhern

100 years of NYC pop

vulture's jody rosen put together a pretty delightful playlist including 100 songs about new york from 1928 til now.

holy moly.

have y'all been hearing about those guys who turned themselves in this week for basejumping off WTC1 last year? here's their helmet cam video. nothing happens til around 2:30 when everything happens. mostly just creepy!

thanks a lot for forgetting our bearthdie

well, we waited and waited for someone to wish us a happy 5 years old 2Pz day, but no one did. actually, we totally didn't notice either. but on march 9th, we turned 5. it feels like its been so much longer. you're invited to celebrate with us by revisiting the first day of 2Pz. you're welcome for everything!!

magic for dogs

and homework for melissa / isabellagetdown.


thx matt and ktv!

happy triangle shirtwaist factory fire anniversary!!!

and by happy, i mean sad.

everyone take a moment to reflect while spec-ing your panic hardware today!

march madness fun factz : SEC dominance edition

In many ways, Tennessee's emergence has run parallel to the Wildcats'. Like Kentucky, the Volunteers were always obviously talented. Like Kentucky, Tennessee's advanced analytics revealed a team far better than its record suggested. Like Kentucky, which beat Louisville on its own floor in December, the Vols' 35-point win over Virginia gave fans a result to point to and say, see? Like Kentucky, UT spent most of the SEC season underwhelming -- being swept by Texas A&M, losing to Vanderbilt, getting overrun on defense at Missouri -- before flipping some kind of switch in the final weeks.

The result for the SEC, combined with Florida's wins, is a 7-0 SEC record in the NCAA tournament. It's the first conference to go 7-0 or better in the NCAA tournament entering the Sweet 16 since the Big East went 8-0 in 2003, according to ESPN Stats & Information. The last time the SEC went 7-0 or better in the NCAA tournament entering the Sweet 16 was 1996, when Kentucky won the national title.

That was the dominant discussion late in the day Sunday -- how the lowly SEC had redeemed itself in the NCAA tournament. Some even went so far as to claim the SEC had been unfairly maligned, that the tournament revealed a league far stronger than anyone previously realized. (via)

turns out, we can haz basketball too.

is Milk the handsomest Drag Race contestant ever?

lady gaga released this epic music video this past weekend

starring the real housewives of beverly hills and andy cohen. srsly.

great news!

swiperboy has #blessed us with a basketvols jam!

the new X-Men time travel movie trailer

radio jamz - "#SELFIE"

i was in a car this weekend so i wanted to share with you the newest thing on the radio.

I'm BAAAAAAACCKKKKKKK!

I know everyone was worried but I'm back and hopefully smarter (minus those extra brain cells I left at the bar on Saturday night). And this post is for Joel...

re: 2ooPz HooPz, i'm killin' you hoes

hate it or love it, cause you broke hoes gonna talk
i can go in any club and shut that bitch down
i can come in yo city and make it my town
so when you see me, ho you better smile and don't frown

LE1F - boom

2ooPz HooPz shame shower, for phil.

here is a list of participants who bet against the basketvols today:

@carefullyaimeddarts
@ljstern1
@flimlim (gasp.)
@maxfrevert82
@mizmargauxxx (GASP.)
@CoachThunda
@H00sierdaddy24
@Nelly37130
@infiedavery
@WvVolunteer2007 (#smh)
@StevieEmbree
@MJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJ23 (wow.)

and also president barack obama.

RELATED : joel currently leads the competition outright!

i hope you all have the basketvols advancing in your brackets.

when i'm given 3 tasks to do and it's friday at 4:10pm

BIRDS ARE AMAZING

why are the basevols so good this year?

they're off to a 17-2 start, and it might have something with their fun pre-game of "how fast can we clean up the field?". adorable.

i went to the Game of Thrones Barclays premiere

and it was a real fun time. they confiscated everyone's phones beforehand, though, so everyone was stuck enjoying the event IRL instead of hashtagging it nonstop. every five minutes you would reach into your pocket for your phone, but it was safely put away in an intricate paper bag system they set up outside in tents. eep.

the event opened with an adorable high school marching band who tooted the game of thrones theme song. they were sorely lacking in mics, however, so it sounded a little...sad. who cares though, because the next musical act was...COMMON.

he performed his song "ladder" from the GoT mixtape, catch the throne. 

then they announced the emcee of the night, HODOR. the crowd went bananas. then he intro'd george rr martin, who wore his shiniest going-out vest:

and the rest of the surprise guests, which were shae, samwell tarly, and arya, my fave (besides jon snow duh). look how cute and modern they all look!

they asked a bunch of questions, but i wasn't paying attention bc i was waiting for kit harington to pop out from behind the iron throne. oh wellz. BTW, they gave that iron throne away to someone in the audience, and george rr martin was like, "it's the perfect addition to any new york city apartment." lolz.

here's the dingdong that won the throne:

we were all uberjealous but then thought about having to carry that on the subway and guessed it was probably for the best. they played the premiere, and everyone bugged and booed and hissed and clapped. it was like watching tv with 7000 of your closest nerd friends. then it ended and we all had to pick up our cellphones back outside barclays. i would've used #longwait and #terrible to describe it but my phone was still in a paper bag somewhere. a great brooklyn night indeed.

stop the press - rupaul and john waters drive around

UPSET ALERT

cincinnati, who i have in my final four, shit the bed.

so. #fuckingohio

an acoustic Aaliyah cover from Banks

billy on the street with lena dunham, a cow, and an old lady named elena

UPSET ALERT

6-seed ohio state just lost in the first round. this upset should be particularly upsetting to sara jane, who has ohio state winning the entire tournament. #nevertrustohio #suckeyes #beatdayton

trend alert - abandoned bunnies

apparently nyc has an abandoned bunny problem. more bunny rabbits than ever are being left in our parks and streets, but they cant survive out there!
via

Domestic bunnies are vulnerable to whims of weather, predators and people — doomed to die if they aren’t quickly saved.

The rabbits “usually look clueless, confused,” said Sean Casey, head of the nonprofit rescue group Sean Casey Animal Rescue, Inc. in Kensington, where Prospect Park, Sunset Park and the bucolic Poly Prep Country Day School are popular bunny-dumping grounds.

sexercise - kylie minogue

 \

and the vfiles/ ssion/ kylie collaboration video...

this is how Ms. Dangles wakes up in the morning

via

enjoy this completely revisionist account of the basketvols win last night.

they don't make much mention of how we were losing for nearly the entire game or how it went into overtime and how iowa basically gave up.

i think i'd prefer cuonzo leave the "just have fun" part out of his pre-game speech. BUT. a w's a w. i'll take it.

LAST CALL FOR ENTRIES!!

you don't want to be left out, do you? i think you have until 11.00am.

here's a quiz

POST YOUR RESULTS!

NEWS IQ QUIZ!
(HOPPED UP ON COFFEE...CANT THINK STRAIGHT)
i scored 9 out of 13 - does that mean i passed?!?!

hey guys!

i want that.

just in time for summer.

thx jess!

oooOOOoooohhhhhhh

look at all these gorgeous long-exposure shots of new orleans houses at night.

you know how i love walking around at night peepin' up in people's houses.

gchatting with melissa about breakfast

did you see Meryl Streep in this trailer for The Giver

dan humphrey's brooklyn band isn't half bad!

(via)

ctm.

it's not a fantasy if you believe in yourself #hero http://t.co/MJROtZ0MZ4 (h/t @nathanjwhitaker) pic.twitter.com/3cnzqWpdFp
— Dan Amira (@DanAmira) March 19, 2014

(via)

the fire in greenpoint

i saw smoke rising over the navy yard when i was leaving work yesterday evening. then kylie sent me this pic of what she thought was a fire at the disaster eggs. turns out it was a recycling facility across the street at 860 humboldt street. the firefighters finally stamped out all the embers this morning.

good luck with that old used up cheater

bruce pearl is going to try to go whip the auburn basketball program into shape. via

his best years are certainly behin
d him. #govols #butteagleass

nashville scene complains about nytimes talking about a brooklyn recipe for nashville "style" hot chicken

im guessing the nytimes will not be issuing any sort of response.

read the full whiny blog post here.

 Really, New York Times? You think you've given away the secret to Nashville-style hot chicken? I'm guessing André Prince Jeffries of Prince's Hot Chicken Shack might have a thing or two to say. Not to mention the exclusive recipe Bites passed along. 
...
 Do we cut the, ahem, paper of record some slack for inserting the word "style" in there? I guess that's kind of the food writer's equivalent of the word "alleged" in an investigative story. Sort of gets you off the hook. I can just hear the reporter on the phone with Jeffries now: "No, ma'am, we didn't say, 'the secret to Nashville hot chicken.' We said, 'the secret to Nashville-style hot chicken.' " 
...
 Furthermore, I'm guessing Prince's will never be owned by a restaurant group that describes it as "an urban 'country cafe.' " Just sayin'.

sia - chandelier

the internet is joking that sia just released rihanna's best song of 2014. if you don't get it, it is funny because sia writes songs for major pop stars including rihanna, and obviously this song would be so much better if she had let rihanna sing instead of releasing it herself. no shade.

a brooklyn recipe for nashville hot chicken

ive never made fried chicken before, but who wants to volunteer to experiment with me?? check out the recipe from peaches hothouse

europe is just a bunch of lines on a map

via watch the border change over the course of history. it never has quite settled down over there.

AHS season 4 : carnival edition

The rumors surrounding American Horror Story's next season were nearly correct, as writer Douglas Petrie confirms on the Nerdist Writers Panel podcast: "Yes. It doesn't have a title, but that's the idea. Very roughly, that's the idea." Yes, next season of American Horror Story will be set in a (spooky!) carnival. But not a spooky carnivale, because that was already a show. Those of you already afraid of deranged carnies? Choose a different show. (via)

do you recognize this man

if so, report his whereabouts immediately to starla because he is the suspect caught on surveillance video shooting 3 teenagers and a 12 year old in the legs in williamsburg. starla is our local neighborhood activist stopping news crews and tracking down information. does that look like thomas wilhelm to you? can anyone confirm his activities this weekend??? NEWS STORY

is it just me...

...or is gchat down? let's talk here.

look at sweet, silly chicago

Chicago River Goes Green for St. Patrick’s Day (Photo: @reuterspictures) http://t.co/pjIMJFLqyj pic.twitter.com/kAbpYuCkYA
— NBC News Pictures (@NBCNewsPictures) March 15, 2014

there's a bunch of aerial river-dying photos here. bless their hearts.

there was a little earthquake in LA this morning

(via)

the more you know

Here's where all the Irish people in America live http://t.co/F1FAX7FkQS pic.twitter.com/zGyZgWwiFr

— Joseph Weisenthal (@TheStalwart) March 17, 2014

no shade.

fridayz with flim

we're almost there! enjoy yourselves!!!!

2PzNaPpod 2014 MARCH MADNESS BRACKET!!!!1111

as i write this, the basketvols are busy taking care of a little business (south carolina) in the SEC tournament. once that's over, they're most likely going to be playing in the NCAA tournament for the first time during coach cuonzo's tenure.

this sunday is selection sunday, and once all the teams are announced, it'll be time to fill out your brackets. we've set up a 2PzNaPpod group, and its completely free to join! #normcore

so go ahead and join our group now by clicking right HERE, and they'll send you an email reminder when it's time. (the password, if anyone asks, is "jazzykismet".) even if you don't know anything about anything, you're not going to want to miss out on this collective competitive experience. trust me.

have you ever wondered about gorilla c-sections?

via

football season is coming

did y'all hear about how the vols new star WR von pearson made the sportscenter top 10 plays segment with a play he made IN PRACTICE?!?!

how exhilirating! #brickbybrick

have we posted this before

 that's MARTHA

this 'first kiss' parody is also good.

i had a whale of a time getting to it without google searching "first handjob" on my work computer.

i love your puppy

jennifer lopez has a new song about puppies and a sexy video to go along with it.

i don't care if it's passe already...

i want to "whale" this weekend.

Le1f on Letterman (i see you back there Dev Hynes)

These Dogs Meet for the First Time. You Won't Believe What Happens Next.

So maybe some of you have seen that black and white vid of strangers kissing that turned out to be a fashion ad for label Wren, but here's a new twist:

OH HI THERE DOGS!

you're probably not even as smart as an elephant

an elephant can differentiate between different human languages and dialects. how many languages do you speak? the more you know

goat of your dreams!

please welcome, bUtTeRMiLk!!!!


she's a rambunctious dwarf goat that loves to RUN and PLAY and KIYUCK!

#tbt

colin powell took this selfie 60 years ago!

what is it, disaster week or something?

first, the mysterious missing malaysian airliner, then the exploding building (which, jicyww, could happen anywhere at any time), and now this.

Early Thursday morning, a driver fleeing a DUI check point crashed into a crowd of people at the South by Southwest festival in Austin, killing two and injuring 23 others. (via)

has anyone checked the levels in the disaster eggs...

i love it when chelsea handler gets mean

via

DANGER CAUTION EXPLOSION MANHATTAN

a couple of buildings blew up in Harlem. don't worry, everyone you know and love is safe. check here for comprehensive updates.

billy eichner on the 4th hour with hoda and kathie lee

watch here

HODOR HODOR

is GAY.

an interesting read about christo and jeanne-claude

in interview magazine. check out what that kook has cooked up next.

think about it

what should we do about north ikea

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis: President Barack Obama from President Barack Obama

president barack obama went on between two ferns

oh yeah right! like Daenerys would ever get that close to Cersei

The cast of @GameOfThrones on the cover of the new @VanityFair pic.twitter.com/dfsgcepKfT

— Peter Davis (@PeterDavisNYC) March 11, 2014

They call them "digester eggs"

Some explanation of these Greenpoint features from NPR:
"Every year, Americans send millions of tons of food to the landfill. What if you could use all of those pizza crusts and rotten vegetables to heat your home? That's already happening in one unlikely laboratory: the Newtown CreekWastewater Treatment Plant in Brooklyn." MORE HERE

is this what billy eichner does? because i like it.

HIDE HIDE hide HIDE

FRIDAY

I am just ready for the weekend. How bout you guys?

time magazine takes a stab at figuring out why nashville is so hot right now

hint: rich white people

netflix rex

you guys, netflix just released season one of the french horror series "the returned" and i watched the first ep last night and it is good!!!

true detective set pieces, explained

if you're a fan, you're going to like vulture's in-depth look at the creation of the show's iconic imagery.

strike a pose

VEEP

Suck it, George Washington. #veep @VeepHBO pic.twitter.com/DlpqqML6SW

— Julia Louis-Dreyfus (@OfficialJLD) March 6, 2014

true detective finale is on sunday!

thx lube!

books and pages = OVER.

this blew my fucking mind today:

The “Optimal Recognition Point” (ORP) is slightly left of the center of each word, and is the precise point at which our brain deciphers each jumble of letters.

The unique aspect of Spritz is that it identifies the ORP of each word, makes that letter red and presents all of the ORPs at the same space on the screen.

In this way, our eyes don’t move at all as we see the words, and we can therefore process information instantaneously rather than spend time decoding each word. (via)

250 words per minute:


350 words per minute:


500 words per minute: