30 September 2011

RIP: Heidi The Crosseyed Opossum

"This week Heidi the cross-eyed opossum was put to sleep at Germany's Leipzig zoo. Heidi was three and a half and had been listless and unable to move for weeks."

It's Definitely Not His Birt'day

Harmony Korine teamed up with fashion brand Proenza Schouler (is that a Chloe reference or what?) to make this disturbing short film titled Snowballs. Lauren Santo Domingo used the phrase "crystal meth trailer park" to describe it, and while I didn't know who she was until a few seconds ago, I have to agree with her.
The film features clothing from the PS fall line which is inspired by Native American culture, specifically Navajo Textiles, and the warbonnets a one-dimensional and racist flourish compared to the subtlety of the clothes were added by Korine.

I think it's beautiful, but meaningless and weird as hell.  Also, that squeaky little voice is really grating.



This is too wild. Train surfing is the new batmanning is the new owling is the new planking.

Update on the Pepper Sprayed

She's from GREEN POINT! Neighbors!

Interview with Pepper Sprayed Protester Chelsea Elliott from ANIMALnewyork.com on Vimeo.

Aurora Borealis From SPACE!

29 September 2011

look at these idiots

well, our stupid UT alumni bar has slapped us right in the face again. look at the way they spelled "tennessee" on their website. i haven't been this insulted since i heard the bartenders were gator-chomping our fans during the florida game.

oh, gmab, NJ trainsit...

Slippery Rail Conditions May Cause Train Delays
September 29, 2011

Autumn’s falling leaves and wet weather have the potential to cause “slippery rail delays,” an age-old problem that affects all railroads in the Northeast and other parts of the world where deciduous trees are prevalent.

Slippery rail condition occurs when falling leaves are crushed by train wheels.  The decaying leaf material creates a slippery, oily residue that coats the rails, resulting in poor traction for trains. 

Slippery rails can make it difficult or impossible for the steel wheels of a train to maintain traction and operate normally.  This condition is similar to the wheels of an automobile on a sheet of ice; the tires may turn but, without traction, the car won’t go very fast.  Unfortunately, a train that encounters traction problems is delayed and can cause delays for the trains behind it, as well.

Doing Our Part

NJ TRANSIT aggressively fights slippery rail conditions with several countermeasures, including:
  • Deploying AquaTrack, our high-pressure rail power-washing system that runs along the tracks
  • Tree trimming and leaf removal near rail lines
  • Strategically spreading sand on the rails in advance of peak periods
Despite our best efforts, the combination of wet conditions following the leaf-fall period may result in traction problems and delayed trains.  As a result, customers may wish to allow extra travel time when traveling during the fall season.

We appreciate your understanding. (via)

sounds like they need to strategically spread sand on their vaginas in advance of peak periods, amiright?!!?!?!?!11


...a bear....eating PIIIZZZAAAA!!!!!!

aziz ansari thursday

dj said he was gonna post this once, but he lost his nerve. i just heard it for the first time (another thing you can do on spotify is listening to funny comedies), and i thought y'all'd enjoy it. #airhornnoises


brb: ouside - FIELD TRIP!

Yesterday we took a group of students to Storm King Art Center in Cornwall-on-Hudson, NY. It was awesome.

Mark Di Suvero
 Alexander Calder
 Roy Lichtenstein
Richard Serra

28 September 2011

new feist album

2Pz movie review

11 BISCUITS! go on and see it.

27 September 2011

just in time for halloween

what's for lunch?

Black bean and corn salsa mixed with orzo, with pile of soy beans mixed in. Tuna wrap (not pictured b/c I already aaaaate iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit)

hay everybody!

don't forget to take a moment to...


joel doesn't know...

...about that amazing cameo on gossip girl last night, because he was too busy watching most eligible dallas.

i know, right?

read the recap (sans chrishere.

ps - i'm pretty much ready to move to california, now that i've seen how happy all of my friends are living there.


a good wilco album.

listen here.

or on spotify, oc.




Paul J. Browne, the Police Department’s chief spokesman, defended the use of pepper spray as appropriate and added that it was “used sparingly.”
But Councilman Peter F. Vallone Jr., chairman of the City Council’s Public Safety Committee, said that in the video clips he had seen, the use of pepper spray “didn’t look good,” although Mr. Vallone cautioned that he wanted to know if any interactions had occurred between the officers and the women in the minutes before pepper spray was used. 
“If no prior verbal command was given and disobeyed, then the use of spray in that instance is completely inappropriate,” Mr. Vallone said. On Monday, several Web sites identified the supervising officer who used the pepper spray as Deputy Inspector Anthony Bologna, a longtime commander in Manhattan. Like a number of other officers, Inspector Bologna is a defendant in lawsuits claiming wrongful arrests at protests staged during the Republican National Convention in 2004...
According to the Police Department’s patrol guide, officers may use pepper spray under certain conditions, including “when a member reasonably believes it is necessary to effect an arrest of a resisting suspect.” The guide also advises that the spray should “not be used in situations that do not require the use of physical force.”

need some costume help?

who better than martha? thx rachel!

check out all of martha's halloween ideaz, and let us know which ones you'd like to see thomas wilhelm and me attempt. 

sufjan stevens rap sample

i just heard this song on spotify, and i was all "that sounds familiar..."

i like it. i also really like his dance moves.

(side note : he is friends with wiz khalifa and they both went to leigh anne's high school. in pittsburgh, the crown jewel of pennsylvania if you don't count philadelphia.)

nypd : jerks?

i actually stumbled onto this scene saturday afternoon, and while i didn't know exactly what was going on, the police response seemed a little excessive for what was a relatively small group of nonviolent protesters on 12th street. here's the follow-up on the particular pepper spray incident:
When members of the loose protest movement known as Occupy Wall Street began a march from the financial district to Union Square on Saturday, the participants seemed relatively harmless, even as they were breaking the law by marching in the street without a permit.
But to the New York Police Department, the protesters represented something else: a visible example of lawlessness akin to that which had resulted in destruction and violence at other anticapitalist demonstrations, like the Group of 20 economic summit meeting in London in 2009 and the World Trade Organization meeting in Seattle in 1999. (via)

barack obama : anti-christ?

some weirdo decided to go and shout the following at the president in LA yesterday:
"Christian God is the one and only true living God! The creator of Heaven and the universe! Jesus Christ is God! Jesus Christ is God! Jesus Christ is God! You are the anti-Christ!"
reminds me of what those KKK guys shouted right before they shot up chalkie's bootlegging barn on boardwalk empire. barack played it cool, as always. #spoileralertretroactive.

southwest airlines : gaycist?

leisha hailey, from the l word and uh huh her, was kicked off a flight recently after kissing her girlfriend. southwest has cited complaints from other passengers. hailey cites homophobia, and is calling for a boycott.


26 September 2011

i lol'ed

what today is like.

what are you doing tonight?

gyyyooossssiiippppp gyyyuurrrrrllllll!!

it's back!

the table is set!

 On October 8th, UT will play UGA at 7pm in beautiful Neyland Stadium in Knoxville, Tennessee. Where will you be watching the game?

what a freak.

i don't quite understand exactly what this means, but bjork's new album, biophilia, will have an interactive ipad app, where you can manipulate her songs. this is a demo of the app for "moon":

the 'moon' app is a musical sequencer that explores the similarities between the cycles of the moon and tides with sequences in music. change the phase of the moon to control the number of notes, and change the phase of the pearls to alter their pitch.
download the app

25 September 2011

Third Time's the Charm!

Get ready for WWIII!!!!  I'll give you one guess as to whom it might start with.  Give up?  It's the Germans...again.

Germans are scared that if the European Central Bank starts printing more money to keep Greece solvent, they'll be unable to resist their old Nazi habits.  Following WWI, the German Central Bank began printing extra money to pay domestic debts and reparations, and many Germans believe the resulting hyperinflation allowed the Nazi Party to seize power.  Poland's Finance Minister is shaking in his wooden shoes (Polish people wear wooden shoes right?) saying that a collapse of the Euro Zone and the European Union could lead to widespread political instability and war in 10-20 years.

Not helping matters is Silvio Berlusconi who referred to German Chancellor Angela Merkel as an "unfuckable lard-ass".  that.is.an.actual.quote.  Honestly I've gotta say, after being called that I'm not so sure I would blame her if she became a lady Hitler.

Anyway, you should probably start stockpiling guns, composting your poop, and turn your bathtub into a tilapia farm/hydroponic garden because if the Mayan apocalypse doesn't come in 2012, the German's will be waiting in 2021.  Either way, we're all screwed.


yes nanny.


Hydro Dog Therapist

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

via Harper, an 11-week-old pit bull born with a debilitating disorder commonly known as “swimmer puppy disorder,” was found in a trash bag and brought to a shelter to be euthanized. Dogs with pectus excavatum can’t walk and aren’t expected to survive, but Harper was lucky enough to find shelter regular Erica Daniel, who took the puppy home and, with a little TLC, slowly helped Harper learn to stand on her own four paws.

meryl streep, never don't compromise

the iron lady

too cute for school

bear puppies play in the street.

24 September 2011

23 September 2011

blog sneak attack

me: brb work
rachel: when you get back, i think i went on a date with a mennonite

Good Wife Wednesdays! Open Call.

Please come and join us as we watch "The Good Wife" each and every Wed at GPP starting September 28th. We are starting at the beginning of Season 2 on DVD as Season 3 gets DVR'ed.
"But I've never even heard of The Good Wife, What is it about?" 

Keeks answers that question after the jump.


Pieces of this satellite, some as large as a CITY BUS, are going to careen to earth today. Hope you brought your forcefield to work.

article from NYT

don't ever forget how much strength you have.

totes watching this. who's with me?

thx rachel for the heads up.

spotifriday : middle school

well, i started off making a pearl-jam-inspired playlist, but then i realized "god, why are there all these good songs from the years 1994-1996?", and then i realized those are the same years i was in middle school.

presenting.... cms tigers!

it's pretty emo. so enjoy that.

is this anything?

gawker showed me this video of a guy on an america's-got-talent type show from chile or something who does an incredible eddie vedder. consequently, i think this just became pearl jam friday.

how exciting.

i feel like i've seen the entire movie now. but still, it looks good. can't wait.

22 September 2011

coach fashion

two nearly dead old geezers talk about tennessee vol coach fashion through the ages.

rafael nadal has a butt. that is all.

for armani underwear. butt.

your phone is going to work on the subway now

good news!? MTA is dragging itself by the bootstraps into the 90s and will finally provide cell service at six pilot subway stations on 14th street. via.

As promised, underground cell-phone service for AT&T and T-Mobile customers is coming, and will start at six subway stations on Tuesday. The A, C, E, F, L, M, 1, 2, and 3 platforms along 14th Street, along with the C and E station at 23 Street, will provide the testing ground for Transit Wireless, with all stations expected to be connected by 2016. No one will ever have to put their devices away again. [amNY]

goner fest starts tonight in memphis

go see some live music.

i had no idea this existed. UPDATE

UPDATE: can you spot the architect? HINT: looks like doctor evil.

jane's carousel, housed in a pavillion designed by dr. evil jean nouvel. at brooklyn bridge park!

field trip!

were you wondering what your prize was?

we won't keep you in suspense any longer.

as the 250,000 hit, Chad Lemon gets...

a date with 2Pz sometimes correspondent STARLA!!

whenever her schedule is clear, you can fly (yourself (on your own dime)) to new york city and buy her dinner and a movie. Of course Starla will choose the movie, and the dinner location. Starla has expensive taste, and many New York restaurants are cash only, so please keep this in mind.

Thank you Chad, and you're welcome.

daily ri ri

Rihanna f/ Calvin Harris - We Found Love (Radio Rip) by headphonesupiii

omg are you ready?
this is the new single from her new album which now has a release date of november 21st. via.
sounds like we might be getting the rihanna house/dance album we have all been waiting for.



the iconic indie band of the 80s and 90s is calling it. did you know that nightswimming was written about micheal stipe's boyfriend casey spooner?

whats your favorite REM song? leave it in the comments.

you win again, internet.

after weeks of dodging all the internet's attempts to convince me that lana del ray is the new hotness, i've surrendered. this song is beautiful. no one can deny it.

and check out this one, called "diet mountain dew".

i'll pay attention to you for a minute, LDR. let's see where this goes.

an open letter from troy davis

written on september 10, 2011:
As I look at my mail from across the globe, from places I have never ever dreamed I would know about and people speaking languages and expressing cultures and religions I could only hope to one day see first hand. I am humbled by the emotion that fills my heart with overwhelming, overflowing Joy. I can’t even explain the insurgence of emotion I feel when I try to express the strength I draw from you all, it compounds my faith and it shows me yet again that this is not a case about the death penalty, this is not a case about Troy Davis, this is a case about Justice and the Human Spirit to see Justice prevail.
I cannot answer all of your letters but I do read them all, I cannot see you all but I can imagine your faces, I cannot hear you speak but your letters take me to the far reaches of the world, I cannot touch you physically but I feel your warmth everyday I exist.
So Thank you and remember I am in a place where execution can only destroy your physical form but because of my faith in God, my family and all of you I have been spiritually free for some time and no matter what happens in the days, weeks to come, this Movement to end the death penalty, to seek true justice, to expose a system that fails to protect the innocent must be accelerated. There are so many more Troy Davis’. This fight to end the death penalty is not won or lost through me but through our strength to move forward and save every innocent person in captivity around the globe. We need to dismantle this Unjust system city by city, state by state and country by country.
a pretty good "catch up", in case you have no idea what this is about
an open letter to the state of georgia (from the huffington post)
ann coulter's insight

21 September 2011

you did it!

we would like to congratulate reader ChAd LeMoN!!!!111 for being the 250,000th idiot to click up into 2Pz!! he writes:
"I've only been reading your blog for about two months now daily (thanks to Sara Robinson) but luckily, my job is super boring and 2Pz gives me my mid-morning giggle each day!"
he couldn't have done it without us, and you are SO welcome, chad. stay tuned. we'll be announcing your sur-PRIZE tomorrow!!!


a new oh land song

from that movie where a little boy runs around shooting people.

congrats, meg and vomas!!

2Pz friends meg and thomas got married a couple of weeks ago. a little story:

five years (almost to the day) before this photo was taken, which features the now ubiquitous "VOM" face, our little thomas was visiting his friends in new york city. we took him to the tennessee alumni bar to watch what i believe was the first game after we moved here. needless to say, we overdid it.

in a particularly raucous moment, thomas lost his composure, and, well. he vom'd into a plastic cup. just a little. but it happened. he calmly excused himself and went to the bathroom to properly dispose of the cup. he is now and will forever be known as "vomas". the end.

extreme cribs

The enchanting village of Monsanto is located on the side of a mountain in Portugal and is home to an incredible sight. With houses squeezed between gigantic boulders and tiny streets carved through the rocks, the village's appearance hasn't changed in centuries. (via)




The Macarthur Fellows have been announced! Mostly it's a snooze-fest except for one of my favorite NPR hosts: Jad Abumrad! Congrats! Listen to Radiolab podcasts here, and read about the other genius fellows here. $500,000 over five years to spend as he sees fit. Maybe get some new shirts... Sucks to be Robert Krulwich, amiright?

You are the WORST!

Michele Bachmann told the nation that the cancer-preventing HPV vaccine was "dangerous" and now even less people are going to get their daughters immunized. link


what is holmes doing?

being held down as he gives neely her birthday card. holmes, what are you looking at? #imoverhere

happy birthday neely!!

is that your baby?

we spotted this adorable interception while patronizing brother jimmy's on sunday. he's never letting that ball go.


looks like bones is feeling better.

moe's  = nature's best medicine.

look what i found in our drawing files.

engineers are disgusting.

have you ever walked down the street bawling?

i wish i could say it was the first time. please do yourself a tearful favor and listen to this extremely touching interview of maurice sendak by fresh air's terry gross.

20 September 2011

i'll watch that

the monkey and the puppy

via playtime is the best time

is that your baby?


#winning = getting faced by tina fey at the emmys


i hope so


What Did Joel Do This Weekend?

Robbed a Jo-Ann Fabrics down in Orlando so he could stock up on drag supplies:
"It's a whole gang of drag queens," said Amanda Marshall, manager of Jo-Ann Fabrics on East Colonial Drive in Orlando, where police arrested three suspects Sunday afternoon. "They were real upset when the police made them take their wigs off."
Nothing, and I mean nothing makes Joel more angry than having to take off his wig.
When confronted, some of the suspects handed over merchandise to the staff while others bolted through the front door. One of them, Demitri Marsh, Joel Melton 19 28, swore at a clerk and threatened to cut her before fleeing, reports state.
 That sounds like him.


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