ugh.

RHofATL's kim zolciak has a hot new single out! and by 'hot new single'...i mean 'infuriating musical abortion'.

kim zolciak - tardy to the party

nene, how could you sell out your catch phrase like that?

ykwgmg: prosperity

A healthy democracy requires vigorous debate, and in spirited opposition to the KOCH Industries Inc. funded grassroots organization, Americans For Prosperity, I would like to found the Americans for Failure, Euthanasia and Forced Abortions, or AFEFA.

Some people might think AFEFA is un-American. But hell, what isn't un-American these days? War protesting hippies are un-American, gun toting rednecks with swastika signs at town hall meetings are un-American, it's all a wash. I contend that AFEFA is perhaps the most ultra-American organization to ever grace God's green earth, because we espouse the belief that America is better than prosperity.

Ask yourself, what's the big deal with prosperity anyway? The more you have, the more you stand to lose. That's why we demand failure. Failure is easy, it can be quick, and once you hit bottom, you always know where you stand. Fact: every prosperous civilization in the history of the world has eventually failed and been replaced by a successor. It's time we break the cycle of prosperity and failure, with enduring failure. Why delay the inevitable? Let's let China take up the futile pursuit of success, because we're better than that.

Still not convinced? Consider Jesus. By modern standards, the man would be considered a complete and total failure. What do you think his FICO score would be? He might have been able to turn water into wine, but I doubt he could turn a 300 into plastic. The point is, the son of God is intended to be our supreme example, the one to show us the way to eternal life, and yet there's no way in hell he could swing a mortgage. According to his bank ledger, one would be lead to believe that bankruptcy is next to Godliness. Given this is a Christian nation shouldn't we be giving failure the chance it deserves? I think so.

;(

joelz speekerz

in honor of melissa

congrats on the baby celine.

go away...

Joe Wurzelbacher (aka. joe the [unlicensed] plumber) chanels my grandmother and tells Nacy Pelosi to "go pick her switch."

your prayers answered...

sustainable underwear!

funny protest signs

(via)

this is a great story.

i'll sum it up for you:

this guy goes on vh1's megan wants a millionaire, which is currently airing and only 3 episodes in. after he's done filming that, he competes in vh1's i love money 3, which hasn't aired yet. also, he wins and vh1 pays him $250,000. on saturday, his wife's body shows up via suitcase-in-a-trash-can in california. now, he's being held in police custody as a suspect in her murder!

meanwhile, vh1 has erased all mention of megan's show from their website, and pulled all episodes off of itunes. the show is just getting started, so i'm not sure how they're going to reconcile this....

omg. ctm. (via)

thx g.

he totes deserves it.

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
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fox news anchor and complete idiot, glenn beck seems to have become an issue for companies advertising on the network. several major advertisers have recently requested that their ads not be run during his program.

here's a collection of statements:

• Allergan (maker of Restasis): "We reviewed our commercial schedule, and based on your feedback, we've put any programming featuring Glenn Beck on our "do not air" list. This means that you will no longer see any Restasis ads during programming featuring Glenn Beck. Thanks again for bringing this to our attention."
• Ally Bank (a unit of GMAC Financial Services): "Ally advertises on a broad spectrum of programs to reach our potential customers. Our advertising is not an endorsement of editorial content on any program. We have ceased to advertise on the Glenn Beck program."
• Best Buy
• Broadview Security: "Given the considerations, we have requested of Fox News not to include us in the rotation that would have our commercials running on Glenn Beck's show."
• CVS: "While advertising on Fox is part of our communication plan, we had not requested time on Glenn Beck's show specifically. We have instructed our advertising agency to inform Fox to ensure Glenn Beck's program is not part of our advertising plan."
• Re-Bath: "...We are no longer airing our commercials on the Glenn Beck Show..."
• Travelocity: "We did not specifically place our ad on the show. We buy ads in bulk and then they are placed somewhat randomly. However, we have now specifically asked that our ads do not appear during this show."
• Wal-Mart: "Walmart today confirmed the retailer pulled ads from the Glenn Beck show on August 3rd,"

(via)

quit being such a dining room table

town hall

daily ri-ri

thx g.

hope diamondz

Ever thought: yeah, the hope diamond is nice enough, I'd take it, but not in that setting!! Who needs it! Well The Smithsonian, in a move taken right out of the playbook of DWTS, ABDC, and SYTYCD, is asking the public to vote for a new setting. Check out the hideous choices here.

guess who...

...is moving to brooklyn heights!

bjork! matthew barney too.

pitchfork : top 500

the pitchfork staff has compiled a top 500 tracks of the decade list. they're releasing it in parts each day this week. some of them take me back to high school, some take me back to last summer. either way, it's a good list and def worth checking out.

here's a little mini-playlist of my faves from their list:

menomena - wet and rusting
wilco - handshake drugs
matthew dear - dog days
midlake - roscoe
broken social scene - stars and sons
m83 - kim & jessie
yeasayer - 2080
grizzly bear - two weeks
ted leo & the pharmacists - where have the rude boys gone?
junior boys - in the morning

i want that.

thx john.