another UPDATE

now the sleazy / hottie director wants to apologize via people magazine:

  "I am utterly distraught about the pain I have caused my family. My beautiful wife and heavenly children are all I have in this world. I love them with all my heart. I am praying that we can get through this together."


umm, should have thought of that before you canoodled Bella Swan.

charlize theron + bella swan, interactive trailer

via

the dying swan

how i got here.

starla in 30 years?

via

looking real good future starla.

swans want to kill you

I know, you probably haven't thought about swans recently. Why would you?! But one thing is sure, you will run into them again in your life--most likely at a park that has some kind of lake or water in it.

Some things you might not know about swans: a male is known as a cob, and a female is called a pen, and the young are called cygnets. But that's where the cool things about swans end.

Other information about swans reveals that they are totally messed up. Like how most swans swim with just one leg, with the other leg tucked up under them. Thats just asymmetrical! The really bad thing about swans is how they pretend to be all cool and stuff but are really total freakshows.

Some firsthand facts: a cool friend's mother was chased by a swan in a park in Hamburg. I know, you think this couldn't happen to you, but it can and it will. My friend's mother's mistake? Trying to feed the mallard behind the swan. That angry, possessive, irrationally aggressive swan chased that nice 40 year old woman trying to eat her ham sandwich.

Bottom line: don't trust 'em.

swan jerks.

looks like the p-park lake is only big enough for ONE swan family!

"The southern father — wings beating, back hunched and neck extended — streaks across the lake with a wake behind him and repeatedly jumps on members of the other family. It looks as if he’s trying to drown them." (via)

thx sj!